Malneirophrenia - A short story

The wind lifts me, pushing me through the crisp mountain air. I rise towards the sun, my eyes open as I watch the Greenlands and trees open for me. The animals and suburb homes become tiny dots along the horizon.

    I’m rushed towards the ground, my eye sockets blaring wide as they battle gravity. I softly land upon the grass, my limbs intact and hair untouched.

  I look around at the vast greenery, as I’m surrounded by a rim of trees. Two stones lie in front of me inches away from each other. Everything else is soil.

  “Somethings not right,” I struggle to see through the thick forest surrounding me, “something’s mis-”

  Pop.

  My head is spinning, I feel myself falling to the ground and brace for impact. I barely recall what had happened. One moment the green woods surround me, the next, a sea of crimson red flames. The fire roars around me; it’s all I can hear. Nothing but the flickering of the flames. I couldn’t hear the whispering around me or the whirring of a machine. Just the crackling and popping of the inferno.

  “Ok ok…” I pant, “just calm down, jus- just calm down”. I grab onto the rocks in front of me, holding onto them like they are my life source.

  The coolness of the rock calms me. My mind is soon quiet and restful, like the first layer of snowflakes in mid-November. I recognize the calm silence of my childhood. My mother and father stand before me holding each other, bundled up in their winter wear.  They beam at me and call out to me whilst giggling.

  “Get up now you don’t want to get frostbite,” My father says. My mother nods. I smile back amazed at seeing them once again. I recall the cotton wool blend of my mother's gloves and my father’s fuzzy beard.

  I don’t move. Or rather I can’t move.

  They come closer to me, I hear the crunch in my mother’s step as the snowflakes begin to wind hurriedly. She walks slowly towards me as if she were walking on a tightrope. Her feet move one in front of the other. 

  Another gust of snow flies into her face. She missteps off her imaginary line and falls onto the snow face first. I sit there paralyzed as the snow surrounding her is tainted red, losing its light and airy quality. Now a patchy and thick texture. The red reaches out to my father's shoes but he doesn’t seem to notice.

  My father reaches out to her and holds onto her hand, softly shaking it. His breath slows, as he lets go and rises upwards. His breath quickens as he stares deep into my eyes. 

  I’ve never seen his eyes so dim and lifeless.

  “No, no no no no” my eyes began to water. 

  My mother’s lifeless body lay in the snow, like a half-eaten mouse on the sidewalk. Her lavender jacket turned a charcoal black colour. My father watched me silently, as he struggled to breathe. I watched his fingers tremble slightly, grasping onto nothing. 

  I try to move, summoning up every part of my body, and make a silent prayer.

Please, please let me go! 

  Nothing happens, the odds are not in my favour.

  “PLEASE!” I shout, "PLEASE I BEG OF YOU!” 

  Nothing, my body was frozen in place like an icicle on a car bumper waiting to be knocked off.

   My father looks at my mother. He smiles faintly and whispers something I can’t quite make out. 

   No.

   My eyes are brimming with tears, “MOVE” I scream, “ JUST MOVE!” My hands quiver as the rest of my body is immobile.

“DO SOMETHING, ANYTHING.”

  His eyes stay on my mother, as his hand loses all tension, and droops like a wilting flower.

I fling myself at him reaching for his hand. 

Thud. I recognize the coolness of the stones again.

   Crackle.

  My hand stings, flashing a vibrant red hue. I hold my hand out grasping onto nothing and silently sob. I close my eyes and cry louder until it grows into a scream.

  I can’t hear the flickering flames now. I only hear the crunch of my mother's boots on the snow, and the sound of my father gasping for air. I lay flat on the ground, holding onto the dirt beneath me, feeling an insect crawl across my burnt hand. I turn and watch the insect as I make out a green and red fuzzy caterpillar. 

  I let the world pull me in deep, ripping out my insides and reshaping them. My stomach flips as pins and needles stab my liver, and rubber bands restrict my lungs. 

  I let go of the earth, releasing my monster grip.

  I breathe.

  The pain has stopped. 

  I open my eyes to look at my hand, evenly coloured and textured. My hair is a mess and dress plastered with grass and leaves.

  I rise up from the ground, wipe my eyes, and dust myself off.

  I hear footsteps behind me.

  “Excuse me Miss, but we closed 15 minutes ago,” a man said,” I didn't want to bother you because I could see you were distressed but-”

  I clear my throat.

 “I understand,” I say, glancing at the clean grass and glistening sky “good night then.” I turn away from the man, and quickly walk towards the gates.

Meters away from my car I can’t see the flicker of his flashlight or jingle of his keys. I stop and breathe. I shake my legs a bit and hop like a professional soccer player before a big game.

  I hop in my car and reach for my ringing phone.

  “Hey,” I say in a light tone.

  “Hi. How’s it going?” a voice replies.

  “I’m great, excited for tonight,” I smile, “I’ll uh, be there shortly.”

  “Wait,” he says, “ I know it must be tough with the anniversary and all that so-”

I press my lips tight.

  “So, I’ll be there in 10 mins. No worries” 

  “But if you-”

  “No ifs and buts, I’m a grown woman now I can deal with this. I made a commitment I’m going to stick with it.”

  “I’m sure you are but-”

  “- I’ll see you in thirty.”

  “Wait maybe we should jus-”

  I hang up and take a deep breath.

I look out of my window at the empty parking lot. I thought people were more tactful than that. I leave the parking lot. Waving goodbye at the man from earlier as I drive past the fence.